Main dialogue: an afternoon rushing for a train
Chen is going to Shinjuku to meet her friend Yui. From the ticket gate to the platform and on to meeting Yui, she says 「すみません」 several times, and each time it means something different.
- 女性
あの、すみません。これ、落としましたよ。
(Chen has dropped her travel card) Um, excuse me. You dropped this.
- チェン
あっ、わたしのです。すみません。ありがとうございます。
Oh, it’s mine. Sorry, thank you so much.
- 女性
いいえ。
Not at all.
- チェン
あっ、すみません。
(Rushing off, she bumps into a man) Oh, sorry.
- 男性
いえ、大丈夫です。
No, it’s fine.
- チェン
すみません。この電車、新宿に行きますか。
(On the platform, asking a member of staff) Excuse me. Does this train go to Shinjuku?
- 駅員
はい、行きますよ。
Yes, it does.
- チェン
ありがとうございます。
Thank you.
- チェン
ゆい、ごめん。待った？
(In Shinjuku) Yui, sorry. Have you been waiting long?
- ゆい
ううん、大丈夫。わたしも今来たよ。
No, it’s fine. I’ve only just got here too.
- チェン
よかった。
Oh, good.
In this dialogue, each 「すみません」 means something different: when the passer-by stops Chen, it is getting attention; when Chen takes the card, it is thanks; when she bumps into someone, it is an apology; before asking the station staff, it is getting attention again. With her friend Yui, Chen switches to the more casual 「ごめん」.
How strong a 「ありがとう」?
| Japanese | Meaning | When to say it |
|---|---|---|
| どうも | Thanks | very light: someone holds the lift or hands you something |
| ありがとう | Thank you | friends, family, people younger than you |
| ありがとうございます | Thank you (polite) | shop staff, strangers, teachers, bosses; the most common |
| どうもありがとうございます | Thank you very much | when you want to thank someone more formally |
| 本当にありがとうございました | Thank you so, so much | after someone has helped you a great deal and it is all done |
The difference between 「ございます」 and 「ございました」 is whether the matter is finished. While someone is helping you, or has just handed you something, say 「ありがとうございます」; once the help is over and you are parting, people often say 「ありがとうございました」. That is what shop staff say after you pay. The two are often mixed, and using the “wrong” one isn’t rude.
あ、どうも。
Oh, thanks.
Someone holds the lift door for you. A nod and this phrase are enough.
この傘、ありがとうございました。
Thank you for lending me this umbrella.
When you return something, the borrowing is over, so use 「ございました」.
ありがとう。助かった。
Thanks. You saved me.
Said to a friend. 「助かった」 means “I was saved”, and it often follows a thank-you.
Three uses of 「すみません」
| Use | Example | Note |
|---|---|---|
| apologising | あっ、すみません。 | bumping into someone, treading on someone’s foot, keeping someone waiting |
| thanking | すみません、ありがとうございます。 | someone has gone to trouble for you: picking something up, giving you a seat, treating you |
| getting attention | すみません。 | calling staff, asking the way, getting through a crowd |
Thanking with 「すみません」 carries the sense of “sorry to have put you to trouble”: the other person did something extra for you, so you first acknowledge the trouble and then thank them. That is why 「すみません。ありがとうございます。」 together is very common, and more considerate than saying just one.
すみません、降ります。
Excuse me, I’m getting off.
On a crowded train, say this as you make your way to the door at your stop.
あ、すみません。お先にどうぞ。
Oh, sorry. After you.
You and someone else reach a door at the same time.
すみません、駅はどっちですか。
Excuse me, which way is the station?
Say 「すみません」 before asking the way; lesson 8 covers this in detail.
Compare
English “Excuse me”, “Sorry” and “Thanks” can all be 「すみません」 in Japanese. When you are not sure which to say, 「すみません」 is almost never wrong.
How strong an apology?
| Japanese | Meaning | When to say it |
|---|---|---|
| ごめん／ごめんね | Sorry | between friends and family |
| ごめんなさい | I’m sorry | a sincere apology to family or friends; children to adults |
| すみません | Sorry; excuse me | strangers, shop staff, teachers, bosses; the most common |
| すみませんでした | I’m sorry (about that) | a formal apology for something that has already happened |
| 申し訳ありません | I’m very sorry | at work, to your boss or to customers |
| 申し訳ございません | We are terribly sorry (you only need to understand this) | shop staff and customer service, to customers |
To say what you are apologising for, put the reason first. The verb goes in the te form, followed by 「すみません」; this 「て」 shows the reason, and you can simply learn it as a chunk.
reason (verb te form)、すみません
With friends, swap 「すみません」 for 「ごめん」; to be more formal, swap it for 「申し訳ありません」.
遅れて、すみません。
Sorry I’m late.
昨日は急に休んで、すみませんでした。
I’m sorry for suddenly taking the day off yesterday.
Said the next day to the manager at your part-time job. It is over now, so use 「でした」.
夜遅くに、すみません。
Sorry to bother you so late.
At the start of a late-night phone call or message.
Tip
「申し訳ございません」 usually means bad news is comingWhen shop staff say 「申し訳ございません」, what follows is often “it’s sold out”, “we’re full” or “we can’t do that”. For example: 「申し訳ございません、ただいま満席です」 (we’re very sorry, we’re full at the moment). You only need to understand it; just answer 「そうですか。わかりました」.
When someone thanks you or apologises to you
| Japanese | Meaning | When to say it |
|---|---|---|
| いいえ／いえいえ | Not at all | when someone thanks you; the most common |
| どういたしまして | You’re welcome | taught in textbooks but not said much; a little formal |
| 大丈夫です | That’s all right | when someone apologises |
| 気にしないでください | Please don’t worry about it | when someone feels very bad about something |
| こちらこそ | Likewise (I should thank you / apologise too) | when both sides should thank or apologise |
In daily life, when someone thanks you, answering 「いいえ」 or 「いえいえ」 with a smile is perfectly natural. 「どういたしまして」 isn’t wrong, but people don’t say it much, and using it every time sounds like reading from a textbook.
いえいえ、いつでもどうぞ。
Not at all, any time.
A colleague thanks you for lending them a charger.
いえ、こちらこそ。楽しかったです。
No, thank you. I had a great time too.
After going out together, when the other person thanks you first.
Watch out
「大丈夫です」 is a natural reply to an apology, but an odd reply to thanks. Note also that in shops it often means “no, thank you”: when the cashier asks whether you want a bag, 「大丈夫です」 means you don’t (lesson 4).
Culture
Thanks and apologies often come with a bow. For a light 「すみません」 or 「どうも」, a nod is enough; for a formal apology, bow lower and hold it longer.